CNN daily headlines always have at least one that shows that their editor(s) don’t really know English that well. Here is the most recent howler. ”A Tennessee jury orders Cracker Barrel to pay man $9.4 million after he was served glass filled with a chemical.” All glasses are filled with a chemical, even an empty one–it’s called oxygen. You could even say that chemicals R us.
Which brings me to the great Di-Hydrogen Oxide scare of a few years ago. I got all sorts of mileage out of this in my writing classes, as very few students figured out the whole thing was a hoax. Here are some of the dangers of H2O.
–It will kill you if it fills up your lungs
–it can swamp your car
–It can submerge all of the plants in your yard or garden
–It can sweep your house away
–If you don’t get enough of it, it can kill you as well
Water is almost as dangerous as oxygen. Too bad we can’t live without either. Alas, education in this semi-literate country. It can kill you as well. That must be why I prefer my H2O to be flavored with some alcohol.
Southern Fusion Cooking 